I got a call from DS a few days ago. He has decided to marry his (now) fiancee. They've been dating about three years. She graduates in May. They're getting married in June. At least they waited until after college to get married. DS has been out of Uni about three years, so he's just now hitting his stride on earning potential.
The problem is that we had not planned to come back to the US until July or August. Two months isn't a lot of time to change our plans, and we have promised to "help out" on the wedding. How much we help will probably depend a lot on how well DS is doing with his income. If he's making wise choices, we'll help more. If he's not making wise choices, we'll help less. We really can't make that decision from a distance.
DW and I are thinking of giving the new couple a gift of enrollment in Dave Ramsey's class. I don't really agree with 100% of DR's teachings, but you can't argue with success. I am about 99% sure DS has put himself in over his head in debt, due in large part to my past performance which he witnessed. It's never too early for him to start to think about retirement. There's no way to plan for retirement while "improving" your credit score.
Anyway, this is only a bump in the mortgage-pay-off road. If we get my bonus on time, then we should be able to overcome any difficulties that this wedding will cause with our budget. If we don't get the bonus on time (you'd have to know our CFO to understand why this is a possibility), then the timing of the wedding will hurt. DW and I have decided to slow down the mortgage pay off and concentrate on vacation/wedding savings instead.
I am certainly blessed to be saddled with the "good" problems I'm now facing. Of course, I've worked for over 30 years to get this overnight success. God's been smiling at me recently, and I'm really thankful for His help. (I apologize to those of you that might find this last statement offensive; however, I am obliged to acknowledge Him in my current situation.)
There goes the Budget!
March 14th, 2013 at 08:27 pm
March 14th, 2013 at 08:45 pm 1363293935
Wishing them many happy years!
March 14th, 2013 at 09:13 pm 1363295597
March 14th, 2013 at 09:20 pm 1363296046
March 14th, 2013 at 09:22 pm 1363296152
Anyway, I will almost definitely give him the class enrollment after asking him if he'll attend. I read DR's book several years back but never really paid it much mind. Finally, when I realized I needed to change my ways, I started to implement Dave Ramsey's goals, if not his strategies. Basically, his goals are "get out of debt and save for retirement." No one can really argue those points effectively. Everything else about his plan is up for debate.
March 14th, 2013 at 09:26 pm 1363296381
I think a DR course is a very nice gift, if they are both interested. Being on the same financial page will serve any couple well. IMO, the promotion of that idea is one of the strengths of DR.
March 14th, 2013 at 09:29 pm 1363296560
As for you son and how he is handling his income -- I can sympathize. I have a 23yo who is a fun loving, adorable but terrible with money guy. He drives me nuts and I love him to death.
All you can do is state your piece and then let them live their lives. Enjoy the wedding. You don't get many of those big special family moments and this is certainly a family before money type of event.
March 14th, 2013 at 11:58 pm 1363305494